The zaphiks servers just aren’t secure…
To: Andy.Street@greaterbrumminghamlep.com From: Andre.De.Jong@zaphiks.in Re: All hail the Mayor!!! 9th September 2016 12:01
How’s the shop going?
I hear in the news that you fancy a knock at the big job, that’s super. Given your work in a similar but totally accountable position for the last few years I’m sure you have what it takes. Don’t listen to the naysayers, Andy, nor the voters!
You’ll need a media guy, it’s all about the advertising these days. Post-truth politics is the new thing so we can just lie all day. AND I still have Dion Dublin’s phone number, can you play dube cube Andy? We could get a load with your logo on.
I’ve already thought of some some slogans for you. How about:
- Taking back control (for exchange only within 28 days of purchase)
- ‘Best Midlands’, or something, it rhymes
- Street cleaning/Streets ahead/Street view something
- Andy Street: Serving the midlands (please take a ticket)
- Never knowingly undersold – not sure what this one means.
- We are the up to 99% off
- Build a Wallmart and make Asda pay for it! (They’re the same company, right?)
- If you want a digger for a neighbour, go to B+Q
- Eat the Rich tasty ready meals in our essentials range.
Btw what’s the best email to get you on now you’re moving on?