101 Things Birmingham Gave The World. No. 24: Vile Products of the Welfare System

Alma Terrace, Highgate

Every tragedy has a beginning, and sadly one of the greatest tragedies of our time begins here, in fair Birmingham. For it was here, in the workshop of the world, that social housing was really born and with it was wrought death and ruin upon the land.

For decades sick-lefitsts have praised their liberal hero Joseph Chamberlain, for giving them the Lebensraum to live feckless lives, and for granting them the license they needed to beat the women they hate within the walls of homes paid for by hard-working Britons like YOU. Joe saw the slums and ramshackle utility production provided for the poor of Birmingham by private enterprise and his communist instincts kicked in. The Stalinist before Stalin’s Artisans’ and Labourers’ Dwellings Improvement Act paved the way for huge slum clearances and building of social housing dole-dwellers mansions on our beautiful countryside. His work was the start of nearly one hundred years of pandering to those who just don’t want to work hard.

Thankfully we are beginning to turn a corner, and once the precariat are rightfully stripped of shelter, murder will once again be the rightful preserve of those who do the right thingmen of good social standing, the educated, and the hard working business owners who make Britain great.

If they want a 3D TV, they’ll have to pay for it out of their allotted fifty three pounds a week.

Author: Howard Wilkinson

Director of Satire, Paradise Circus. Howard adds stability at the top, taking a strategic overview of operations whilst also stepping in from time to time in a caretaker author role.